There’s big difference between how English and indigenous African language people express themselves and just to put a disclaimer; this is not a racist or a tribalist article, it’s just for laughs.
For instance, when Africans speak; they are not only verbal about it but also use body language and also mimic sounds to add a few imaginative effects into their expression or story telling. Below are few examples that show how a Xitsonga person and an English speaking person express themselves.
English Speaker: Wow! Nice Hair!
Xitsonga Speaker: Loyi u rhandza ngopfu swilo wee, se u taku i yini leswinga lukiwa manjhe? A swi zi swiva fanela na nyana.
Translation: This one is such a liker! What is that on top of her head? It doesn’t even suit her.
English Speaker: Babe! Will you please hurry? I am waiting for you.
Xitsonga Speaker: Wena una vulongeta ngopfu! Ndzi ta famba ndzi ku siya mina, u le kwihi?
Translation: You are so slow hey, I’ll leave your a$# behind. Where are you?
English Speaker: Honey! I’m home.
Xitsonga Speaker: Eeee! Ka ha swekiwa? Swi kwihi swakudya? Mina ndzi twa ndlala.
Translation: OMG! Are you still cooking? Where’s the food? I’m hungry.
English Speaker: My child is academically challenged but he is very special.
Xitsonga Speaker: Hayi hayi hayi! Dyi n’wana ledyi dyi ome nhloko, u feyirile futhi! Hikokwalaho ka yini anga tshiki kunene xikolo xa kona?
Translation: Argh man this child has no brain at all, s/he failed again? Why doesn’t s/he just quit school once and for all?
English Speaker: Good try babe.
Xitsonga Speaker: Wena u endla onge u tiva swilo ngopfu, vona se u endle thyaka laa!
Translation: The thing about you is that you think you know too much. Look at the nonsense you’ve just done here!
English Speaker: I lent you a R100 last month, may I please have it back?
Xitsonga Speaker: Wa tiva munhu wa hlupha! Ndzi n’wi lombe mali n’hweti leyinga hela, na sweswi anga se vuyisa. Hambi u lava ndzi n’wi landzelela wee!
Translation: You know some people are just a burden! Last month, I lent someone some money and they haven’t paid it back. I wonder if they just want me to run after them!
English Speaker: Will you please pass me the remote?
Xitsonga Speaker: Kasi TV leyi yi xaveriwe wena ntsena na? Tisa remote yoleyo ni lava ku vona bolo mina.
Translation: Did we buy this TV just for you or something? Pass me the remote, I want to watch soccer.
English Speaker: Will you please lend me your phone? I want to make a call.
Xitsonga Speaker: Awuna airtime nyana kwalano?
Translation: Do you have airtime?
English Speaker: Thanks for the present babe.
Xitsonga Speaker: I mali muni xixexi? Naswona xi xaviwa kwihi?
Translation: How much is this thing? Where did you buy it?
English Speaker: Excuse me, may I please pass?
Xitsonga Speaker: Se miri hiya hundza hi kwihi hina loko mi tata ndlela, etilweni?
Translation: Ummm? Where do you expect us to pass when you’ve literally blocked the pathway, in heaven?
English Speaker: Should we take this to the bedroom?
Xitsonga Speaker: Yhiii! U lava ku n’wana a ze a vuya waha xaveleriwa?
Translation: Wow! So you want our child to come back home and still find me begging you?
English Speaker: Babe, may I please fix your belt?
Xitsonga Speaker: Ihalaa! Mi za mi tlula ti loop mi jahele byo vudlakuta!
Do you know other phrases that African people say differently to English people? Please share with us using #XitsongaVsEnglishSpeaker hashtag and tag @shangazine on Facebook and Twitter.